Midlife Vitality Reset

Ever catch yourself rubbing your lower back, forgetting why you walked into the room, and quietly wondering if this is “just aging”? We’re not buying that storyline. A lot of what gets labeled as getting old is really accumulated exhaustion, stress, inflammation, isolation, and habits that have been draining our bodies for years. So we slow down and make a clearer distinction: chronological age is the number on the calendar, but biological aging is how your body is functioning day to day.

In this episode, Coaches Stacy & Wayne talk about the real-life signals midlife brings, why your body’s feedback isn’t a betrayal, and how to stop expecting today’s body to perform like it did decades ago. Then we get practical about what accelerates aging fast: smoking, too much alcohol, too little sleep, fast food, and sedentary routines that keep us indoors and disconnected. We also dig into social isolation and why it hits midlife hard, plus the underrated impact of sunlight, movement breaks, and simply getting outside for fresh air.

From there, we build the case for midlife vitality. We share realistic strategies for nutrition and hydration, why sleep and circadian rhythm matter for cellular repair, and how movement and breathing can reduce anxiety and improve mood. We also say the quiet part out loud: sometimes we don’t need another supplement, we need support. Coaching, therapy, community, and accountability can be the difference between knowing what to do and actually doing it.

We wrap with affirmations and a simple seven-day one-shift challenge to make this feel doable. If this resonates, subscribe, share the show with a friend, and leave a rating or review so more midlife men and women can find these tools for energy, mobility, confidence, and well-being.

Subscribe @CoachStacyMLewis and @CoachWayneVIP

💃🏽Stacy M. Lewis
🌍 thestacymlewis.com
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🎩Wayne Dawson
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Transcript

Aging Or Accumulated Exhaustion

Coach Stacy 0:08

Have you ever looked in the mirror, rubbed your lower back, forgotten why you came into the room, and then thought to yourself, I must be getting old. But what if part of the reality of what we call aging is really accumulated exhaustion, maybe some stress, inflammation, disconnection, and habits that we've been that have been wearing us down for years. Today, we're talking about what midlife really is asking of us. Not panic, not perfection, but partnership with our own bodies.

Coach Wayne 0:55

You found the midlife revolution unleashed, the space to embrace your wisdom, reignite your passions, and move boldly into what's next. I am Coach Wayne, the VIP coach.

Coach Stacy 1:08

And I'm Coach Stacy M. Lewis. We're here with insights, stories, and strategies to fuel your midlife journey. So take a breath, lean in. Your revolution starts now.

Coach Wayne 1:25

Stacey, I've been rubbing the lower back, and I also have a piece of cordon on my finger. You know what that's for? That's to remind you of something. So I know why I am in the mirror. Hello, folks. This is Midlife Revolution Unleash, and uh today's episode, we're gonna bust up some stuff on aging. And I'm Coach Wayne. I work with men in midlife, helping them to navigate that period of life so that their second half can be their best half. And I'm delighted to have riding next to me the one and only the co-host, Stacy M. Lewis.

Coach Stacy 2:06

Stacy. Hey Coach Wayne, it is always, always good to share this space with you. And welcome to our listener of Midlife Revolution Unleashed. Tonight we are unpacking the difference between simply getting older and aging in a way that leaves us depleted. I don't know about you, Coach Wayne, but I can certainly relate to this topic. I am Coach Stacy M. Lewis. I'm a nonprofit executive, a midlife woman's coach, and a lover of God and his beautiful people. I'm excited tonight to join my co-hosts, talk about this whole thing: aging, energy, mobility, confidence, overall well-being without falling for the hype of getting younger again.

Coach Wayne 2:55

Yeah, Stacey, we uh have heard in many places about reversing the aging process. In fact, people have been looking for the elixir for years at fountain of youth. And, you know, I don't know that anyone has actually discovered it, but we are going to talk tonight about the difference between chronological aging versus biological aging and what does that mean for you, and how you can stave off some of the biological habits that that make you look chronologically older.

Coach Stacy 3:37

Or feel chronologically older, right? We'll get to talk about what drains your vitality faster and why there are some easy things that we can do to do a little course correction and start out small without shaming ourselves or beating ourselves up and really empowering us to move forward in this beautiful season of night.

Coach Wayne 4:03

We'll talk about nourishment, we're gonna talk about the sleep word, and we're gonna talk about stress, the other s word, and how you manage all of these things. So get ready. We are about to last off. Let's dive right in, Stacey.

Coach Stacy 4:22

Yes, yes. So let's let's talk about this, Coach Wayne. Is it aging or is it wear and tear, right? How do we get to think about midlife vitality? How we can change some of our thinking. I love this the way you opened about chronological versus biological age. You know, some people are saying, oh, you know, I'm 65, I still feel like I'm 35. Good for you. Um that's that's not my testimony tonight, but indeed, really acknowledging the difference between how old we actually are and how old we feel, or how old the function of our body feels, I think is an important distinction.

Coach Wayne 5:18

Yeah, yeah. You know, when we get to Midland, we hear conversations like I can't bend as much, my body doesn't bounce back as much, I don't feel as young as I used to. In fact, Stacey, as a joke, you know, when we're in our 20s, we talk about events such as sports and and current events, and then when we get a little bit older, we start talking about the grandchildren and and work, and then when you get to midlife, we start comparing our our medication. And that's the topic of the day.

Reframing Expectations And Body Feedback

Coach Stacy 5:55

No, no, no, no. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry to our audience. He's wrong here. This is not midlife, is not when we are talking about our medications, we're talking about that in in old age. Old age, Wayne, like maybe, maybe 85. I am not ready to talk about my medications list. Let's correct the record.

Coach Wayne 6:21

Well, what we want to let you understand is that because you are experiencing some of the nuances of aging, it doesn't mean you're broken, doesn't mean that you need to toss away the old self. It just means that you need to steward your habits and and the way you use your body and your mind to get more out of it. So, Stacy, that's a key.

Coach Stacy 6:54

Yeah, I think this reframing is so important, right? Because nothing, I mean nothing, not the refrigerator, not the automobile, not the house, nothing is the same 20, 30, 40, 50, 60 years later as it was in the beginning. So any expectation that we have of ourselves or of our bodies to be the same is a false expectation and it needs to be reframed, right? We some of us have, you know, we're in sports and dance and all kinds of activities when we were younger and even to our young adulthood. And and you know, the the body keeps score, right? That's the name of uh a bestseller, right? Because the body does keep score. So just reminding ourselves, as you said, that it's normal to feel a little something, something in the back, or to to to begin to feel new new aches, new issues. And at the same time, we we have some role to play here in making it the best of the key, Stacey.

Coach Wayne 8:17

We our our level of accountability. We owe it to ourselves, and we're responsible for managing how we utilize the body. We've been given the chronological age. We that's something we can't negotiate. It is what it is. Every day, every year, every hour, we're moving up on the clock. But how we get about it has everything to do with how we treat ourselves, the habits that we develop along the way. And, you know, when you see and feel something in your body, it's feedback. And the question is, what are you doing? What is your body telling you now that needs attention, Stacy? Some of us pay more attention to the check engine light on our car than we do to the body and the somatic signs that we get, right?

Coach Stacy 9:07

You are absolutely right. And the reality is that, you know, we have been pouring out and beating up in different ways on our body for a long time. And at this point, there's no longer silent absorption, right? The impact of all of that living is felt and experienced deeply.

Coach Wayne 9:37

Yeah. So, Stacey, why don't we get into gear number two where we start sharing with our audience some of the things we do or know that accelerates the aging process in real life?

Coach Stacy 9:55

Yeah, I think one of the things we can add or how we can wrap the idea around reframing the conversation is to really pose a couple of questions, right? What where has your body been trying to get some attention from you and you've maybe been ignoring it? And what are you still expecting from your body that maybe belonged to a different season? Yeah, yeah.

Habits That Accelerate Aging

Coach Wayne 10:27

And again, you know, be kind to yourself, give yourself grace. Don't overdo, don't push yourself. We typically on a Saturday and Sunday morning go to the park or the gym and get a workout together as a team, as a family. And so we we heard about this boot camp on a Sunday somewhere in Fort Lauderdale. So we are like, hey, we're gonna boot camp. We packed in and we went to boot camp. We looked around. I was the oldest person out there. I looked around and I saw or I looked it. I looked around and I saw everybody, and they were stretching and flexing, and you know, so I'm like, Yeah, let's go. Stacy. We didn't we didn't go back the following week, I'll just say. So you gotta know, you gotta know where you are one and done, huh?

Coach Stacy 11:25

One and done. You were like, We tried it, we gave it a good go.

Coach Wayne 11:29

Yeah, yeah. But you know what? We didn't beat up ourselves, we gave ourselves credit for trying. And so the lesson is you gotta know your limits, but you also have to pace yourself and give yourself grace. Don't beat upon yourself, you know, do what you gotta and uh take heed and be intentional.

Coach Stacy 11:51

You're right, you're absolutely right, and acknowledge to your point, we as we talk about start to talk about, you know, some of the things that actually accelerate aging, making sure that we are being mindful of those things. So let's let's dive into that a little bit, as you said.

Coach Wayne 12:11

Yeah, well, uh smoking, too much alcohol, too much drinking, yeah, right? Too little sleep, you know, too much fast food. Now, now many of us living our best lives. And so that means enjoying others, entertaining, going out. But with that, oftentimes, mean meaning if you're going out often, you're eating, you're not necessarily uh managing what goes on your plate and how it's prepared. And so a lot of times you're having food that is not really for your best, you know, well-being or so. So you have to manage these things, Stacey.

Isolation Sitting And Missing Sunlight

Coach Stacy 12:58

Absolutely. You know, some of the other things include isolation. And I think it was back in 2023 the Surgeon General had produced a pretty significant report on the crisis that is isolation. And and, you know, in midlife, I think for those some in partnered relationships, some not, you know, are experiencing different levels of isolation. And isolation can attribute to aging, right? You stop you stop using your mind in the same way, you stop engaging even physically with people in the same way, that isolation can really accelerate just aging, right? It impacts your your mental health in and really making sure that we're we're pointing these out, not to say, you know, it's doomsday, but to say to pay attention, to pay attention to these small things, right? Like look at your stress level, your sedentary habits. Wayne, I am so tired of sitting in this chair. I've got I've just got to tell you. I mean, you know, I I work remotely, I have a home office, have a big full-time job. I spend a lot of time in this chair. I've considered the investment in maybe like a standing desk or a walking treadmill, and yet here I sit.

Coach Wayne 14:57

Yeah, and not only are you sitting, oftentimes you're not getting vitamin D and all of the other good stuff by being outdoors, the fresh air that you could, not to say it's stale inside, but what I mean is natural fresh air, not the air that's coming through an AC vent. You know, we we here in New York, I I would be indoors a lot in the winter and bundled up and it's cold. And now in Florida, we have the sun, but listen to your point, sit for maybe eight or more hours of the day in front of a computer or with clients, and then in an AC office, Stacy, and then I'm in a car in another AC space, and then I'm in the house in another AC space, not seeing too much sunlight. So I have gotten to make to be intentional, Stacy. I go out and take a walk throughout the course of the day, use the steps in front of instead of the elevator as often as I can.

Coach Stacy 16:01

Yeah, no, I think that's so smart, right? And even that that like standing every 30 minutes or you know, some do every hour, whatever it takes, really seizing those opportunities to get that fresh air, to get some sunshine, to really pay attention to opportunities to socialize, right? And and decrease that isolation. And we've talked about in in previous episodes sleep and rest and the importance that they're they're not uh synonyms. Sleep and rest are not synonyms, but the importance of of both of them, that rest can be very restorative, right? Your sleep is is critical to allowing your body time to restore. So these are some of the things that actually accelerate aging that we really want to make sure we're paying attention to.

Sleep Rhythm Stress And Burnout

Coach Wayne 17:00

Yeah. And you talked about sleep. There's a circadian rhythm that helps and teaches us that there are certain hours during the course of your rest period naturally, where your hormones change and they do that to accommodate restoration of the cells. And so, for example, if you're up at night when your body's expected to start giving you that repair mode phase, it feels like you're supposed to be up and about because you're still awake. And so you delay the system to give you those hormones that allows you to really restore, which is why oftentimes folks who have night shifts, they they have issues in terms of more accident-prone they are, you know, and they develop a lot of diseases, it is said, much more quickly in terms of their immune system is suppressed because of their uh hacked sleep cycle, so to speak.

Coach Stacy 18:14

Yeah, we can ask ourselves some questions, right, that that help us start to get to the root cause of maybe either the acceleration or what we might identify as the lack of vitality. One is which of your current habits is quietly taxing your body the most?

Coach Wayne 18:43

And you talked about identifying habits. It's also important that we recognize how we receive what's happening in the world. So let's look at what is it that we can't change, that we can't manage, that we need to let go so that we're not consumed in mental fatigue and burnout.

Coach Stacy 19:10

Absolutely. Absolutely. Where are you overfunctioning or under-recovering? I like that question. I think I'm going to put that on my weekly assessment. Where are you over-functioning or over-recovering or under-recovering?

Coach Wayne 19:30

And what has become, yeah. Go ahead, you go. Thank you. No, no, I love that. Asking those questions because we're always, Stacy, you know, the audience knows we're always having these conversations with ourselves. And so we just need to ask better questions. What, for example, have we been doing as a norm, which is actually not serving us well? It's harmful to us.

Coach Stacy 19:58

Good questions, Coach Wayne. Good questions. You may not need to overhaul your life, you may need to stop betraying your body in small and repeated ways, though.

Coach Wayne 20:08

Yes, yes. So, Stacy, what supports vitality in midlife? You know, it's a big question. Uh, and a lot of folks are seeking it. Lots and lots of money is spent every day trying to figure out how to stay more vital.

Coach Stacy 20:30

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. You know, you know, Coach Wayne, I was thinking we should have named this episode Midlife Vitality. How to have great sex in midlife. Because I believe that that kind of title, right, would have drawn even more of our listeners in.

Coach Wayne 20:52

Yes.

Coach Stacy 20:53

We might have to tweak it for the podcast players because when I think about what supports vitality in midlife, right, we sometimes downplay, ignore the fact that many of us still want to have enjoy great sex.

Coach Wayne 21:12

Yeah.

Coach Stacy 21:13

And it is that vitality that allows us to do so, right? So as we talk about what supports vitality in midlife, yeah, don't don't just take it for the action itself, but take it for the ultimate benefits. And one of those ultimate benefits can be great sex. Go on, go play. What you got?

Coach Wayne 21:41

Yeah, no, no, absolutely. And listen, Stace, it's all connected, right? You don't just show up in with a state of vitality if you have been beaten up on yourself. So hydration is important, right? Yes, balancing your your diet, getting the right nutrients. In. I'm a vegan and I recognize that I need some B, especially B12. And a lot of men of color and women, I'm sure, are seeing that they don't have enough vitamin D. That's what doctors are saying these days. You know, and so how do you get these things together? So as I say, you can stay vital and idile.

What Supports Midlife Vitality

Coach Stacy 22:27

I think I will add de-stressing, right? One of the things that really will support midlife vitality is eliminating or reducing. I know sometimes it's hard to eliminate stressors, but reducing some of the stressors that you can control. I think talking about and saying again the social connection, right? Decreasing the sense of isolation, engaging yourself in living, right? Getting busy living. And to your point of nutrition, right? That maybe a few more home cooked meals. Yeah. Those of you that eat out every night or you know, do a lot of fast fooding, we we wouldn't ask you to just, you know, make a radical shift. So maybe a few more home cooked meals every week.

Coach Wayne 23:25

Yeah, when yes, they see. And when you go to the supermarket, shop mostly from the outside aisles in, you know, where the produce are. Shops start there and come in as you go in. You enter more of the junk food and the the artificial flavored stuff. So start with the outside and and look for organic stuff where you can. If you have a farmer's market, because even organic today, you can't trust the label sometimes, Stacey.

Coach Stacy 23:53

Well, the that that's a whole new episode. What you what you can trust, right? And what you cannot. And I, you know, the thing about organics, I love organics, right? And and we want to also be real about affordability and access, right? Some some communities don't really have access to whether it be quality produce or organic produce. So, you know, let's do what we can to support aging with a good sense of vitality.

Coach Wayne 24:28

Yeah, yeah. And you know, we're up also against what God served us in terms of genetics and our parents. So working with that is important, recognizing you know what you are, you have a tendency to be boned, they say, and gain in weight and all that stuff. So you gotta work with that, manage that. And some folks have an a tendency to become diabetic based on the way their bodies function. So those things you have to pay attention to. Get checked out.

Coach Stacy 25:06

I love the ability to dive a little deeper on some of these areas, right? You're talking about food, and you know, we talked about produce and shopping, the outer aisles. Eat more real food, real food, and choose foods that support hydration, recovery, you know, that where you're aware of their impact on the inflammation in your body. Yeah, it's it's really there are some small but but profound steps that we can take. And, you know, don't let convenience drive your entire nutrition strategy. We get it. We all, you know, grab something every now and then. Yeah, I think that deep diving a little bit deeper on some of these, right? We talked a little about a little bit about movement. What thoughts might you have really about the the benefits of of movement and and why we should really jump in?

Coach Wayne 26:18

Well, you know, we are providing our cells with more oxygen when we breathe. And when we regulate our breath through movement, we force it to breathe. Uh typically we take very shallow breaths, a lot of us who are not conscious of how we're breathing. You know, we just breathe. And part of the work that I do oftentimes when we want people to still their minds is to teach them breathing strategies so that they can reduce anxiety and breathe in a certain way can also and movement help with reducing depression, right? Yeah. So going outside and doing all of that, and of course, all of those, even though it's it's they're psychosomatic, because if you're managing your mind in terms of feeling depressed, you're not likely to move around and you're likely to be isolated to your point earlier. Whereas if you're going out creating some sort of order in your life and discipline, effort, going out eating at home or preparing food wisely, to your point, walking, don't have to run. Right. You're not competing with anyone but yourself. So pace yourself, but then it makes you feel better. And you run into people when you're out there doing a walk, right?

Nutrition, Hydration And Real Food

Coach Stacy 27:39

So you're absolutely right. You know, reminding ourselves that in this season of saging, as my co-host would say, we don't need only one thing, right? And we don't need only supplements. Sometimes we need support. And, you know, a coach can help you with that, a therapist can help you with that. Let's dismantle any stigma or any sense of shame that we might have with needing support, right? That's that's part of building connection. And so reducing isolation by getting support can really be a benefit. And take these opportunities to explore different ways to relieve stress, whether it be through prayer or laughter or you know, locking yourself in the bathroom for 20 minutes, whatever it takes, we really want to make sure that there's a true sense of ability to adopt some of these, some of these strategies, right? Some of these supports of midlife vitality.

Coach Wayne 29:01

Yeah. And Stacy, you talked about just reaching out and taking care of self. We we echo that all the time. The importance of self-care, you know, removing some of the false beliefs that limit us in terms of asking for help, even. And hey, I, you know, when I work out, I like to have a partner sometimes. So other times I just want to do solo, but it having a partner, somebody waiting for you at the gym kind of gets you out. And so, you know, sharing a meal plan with somebody else in the home, if you do that, kind of encourages you. So some of the things that we talk about is help that you can create in your own community. And then, of course, Stacey, there's the help that we offer in terms of coaching, right? Reaching out to a coach.

Coach Stacy 29:57

Yeah, yeah. That someone that can ask you a question like, Well, what's one daily practice that would help you feel more like yourself again?

Coach Wayne 30:07

Yeah. What would care look like for you this coming week?

Coach Stacy 30:14

Mm-hmm. That's good, that's good. Yeah.

Coach Wayne 30:20

You know, Stacey, it's uh important for us to say to ourselves in a kind, gentle way, we're not gonna punish our bodies, we're gonna honor it. And I think in an episode last week or week before, we talked about the body being our temple, right? And if we absolutely yeah, if we can make a temple, a building from block and stone more sacred than our body, we got it all flipped. And I think at midlife, it's due time that we start honoring ourselves and our bodies.

Coach Stacy 30:54

You're absolutely right. And good evening, Coach Curtis. It is always good to see you. Welcome to Midlife Revolution Unleashed. You know, Coach Wayne, yeah, yeah. We get to remind our listener to really partner with their body, not to bully it, not to shame it, but to really partner. This is the season when the body doesn't cooperate with denial, right? You can try to ignore it if you want, but the body does not cooperate with denial in this season. So partner with your body in this season to really embrace and amp up that midlife vitality.

Movement, Breath And Getting Support

Coach Wayne 31:53

Yeah, yeah. And Stacy, I agree 100%. I want to offer our listening audience a few declarations, affirmations to go out with a bang. How about it? Okay, so number one is let's say I do not have to fear midlife, I embrace it with wisdom. I love it. Another declaration and affirmation would be I can honor the season and still expect vitality. I tell vital, they say in Jamaica.

Coach Stacy 32:32

That's is that what they say in Jamaica?

Coach Wayne 32:35

Yeah, it's vital. That's good stuff. You know what that means, Stacy? Ital means they eat good food, you know, no songs, no, no, none of that artificial stuff. Yeah, got it.

Coach Stacy 32:51

Now, now I know. Yeah.

Coach Wayne 32:57

Another affirmation and declaration, Stacy. Wanna go or you want me to go there? You go, you you wanna roll. I'm a slow, I'm allowed to slow down down long enough to listen.

Coach Stacy 33:13

That's good. Yes, to listen to your body, right? To listen to the signs, yes, yes, yes. To listen to the twinges that hopefully don't manifest into aches and pains, right? It's paying attention to the twinges. I love it. I love it. Yeah, and that's key. I think we Yeah, I think we get to share some opportunities for this to really become practical, right? And and one thing that you can do is take on a seven-day one-shift challenge, right? What is one shift you're going to make for a week? Could be going to bed a little earlier, could be drinking more water, could be making sure you have a conversation with a friend. One thing you're going to shift for an entire week. The seven-day one-shift challenge.

Coach Wayne 34:18

Oh, yeah. Cook and prepare your meals in advance. Do some meal prepping.

Coach Stacy 34:27

Yeah. Yeah. That meal planning, meal prepping can really be a game changer, right? It relieves the instant burden of like, what are we gonna have for dinner? And allows you to really prepare a meal thoughtfully, even if it's even if it's faster, right? It doesn't mean you have to, you know, slave in the kitchen for four hours to prepare a meal, but to really do that advanced thinking about the food that is going to go into your body to nourish your body. That's the goal of the food. That's why we eat to nourish our bodies.

Coach Wayne 35:10

Yeah. Take a stroll, at least 10 minutes. If you can push the 20, that's even better. Even just once a day.

Coach Stacy 35:19

Yeah, yeah. I will land with the basic instruction before leaving earth, right? And in Psalm 9012, I believe it is, it says, Teach us to number our days wisely. Right. So, God teach us to number our days wisely. And it is this midlife wisdom that we have that we're celebrating, right? That we want to really use to amp up the midlife vitality.

Coach Wayne 35:59

Love it. Stace, got to remind the folks listening in because so many folks listen. We're hearing from people all over. Oh, I grabbed your podcast, but folks are forgetting to subscribe. It really helps the algorithm. It helps us to get the word out to more folks. And if this resonated with you, please share with someone, but also go back in and listen to this again or to previous past episodes and like us or rate us or do both because that's really going to help to get the word out.

Affirmations, One Shift Challenge and Closing

Coach Stacy 36:28

Yeah, yeah. We we can't thank you enough for listening, for supporting, for downloading. You really are uh motivating Wayne and I to keep on going because we really do believe that midlife is rich and is to be celebrated.

Coach Wayne 36:53

Yeah. We want to shout out the governor's prevention program out there in Connecticut and our good friend and his team, Roland Harmon, for inviting us last week to just facilitate their community program.

Coach Stacy 37:12

What a gift. It was truly it, truly a gift, truly a gift. And and again, you know, Wayne and I not only enjoy this part of our lives, but certainly feel it there's a bit of calling here to use the gifts and the talents that we have to build community and to empower our community of midlife folks. So I'm cheering y'all on.

Coach Wayne 37:39

Yeah, and I'll see you at the top now. Stacy, when are we gonna do this again? Next Thursday. Next Thursday. We'll see you then.

Coach Stacy 37:50

See you then. Thanks for tuning in to Midlife Revolution Unleashed. We're grateful you're part of this journey.

Coach Wayne 37:57

If you love this episode, share it, subscribe, and hit that notification bell so you don't miss another episode.

Coach Stacy 38:03

I'm Coach Stacy, and I'm cheering you on.

Coach Wayne 38:06

And I'm Coach Wayne, and I'll see you at the top.