Midlife Revolution Unleashed

Flip The Script On Aging

• Stacy M. Lewis & Wayne Dawson • Season 3 • Episode 67

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The most dangerous stories about aging aren’t on the news; they’re the quiet lines we repeat to ourselves. We take those lines head-on and rewrite them with truth, practice, and a dash of holy confidence. Coach Stacy M. Lewis and Coach Wayne Dawson open up about the beliefs that keep people stuck—too old, too late, don’t risk it—and share the tools they use with clients to turn midlife into a launchpad for purpose and reinvention.

We start by naming the myths out loud and tracing where they came from: family scripts, cultural tropes, and borrowed narratives that never fit. Then we test new beliefs with evidence you can see and measure. From stories of late-blooming entrepreneurs to everyday reinventions, you’ll hear proof that age is qualification, not disqualification. We introduce two practical frameworks to make change stick. Wayne’s PAW gap tackles possibility, ability, and worth. Stacy’s MOVE method magnifies your worth, brings clarity to what you want, validates your dreams, and gets you engaging the life you actually love.

This isn’t mindset theater. We show how to rehearse a new script daily with present-tense affirmations, journaling, and micro-actions that turn confidence into data. You’ll learn the ecological test for beliefs—do they strengthen your relationships, work, and health?—and why accountability plus grace beats perfection every time. Expect clear homework: find a role model who defies your stereotype, rewrite two or three false beliefs into truth-based declarations, and practice them where you’ll see and hear them often.

If you’re ready to stop playing small and start building habits that match your wisdom, press play and join the revolution. Subscribe, share this with a friend who needs it, and leave a review telling us the new truth you’re claiming today. Your next chapter is not on hold—it’s calling.

Check out this episode: You're Still Becoming

Subscribe @CoachStacyMLewis and @CoachWayneVIP

💃🏽Stacy M. Lewis
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🎩Wayne Dawson
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Coach Wayne:

The most dangerous stories about aging aren't told by the media. They're held and told by ourselves in our own minds.

Coach Stacy:

And today, we're flipping that script on aging because midlife isn't a slow decline. It's a divine design for reinvention. Let's hit it, Wayne.

Coach Wayne:

You found the midlife revolution unleashed, the space to embrace your wisdom, reignite your passions, and move boldly into what's next. I am Coach Wayne, the VIP coach.

Coach Stacy:

And I'm Coach Stacy M. Lewis. We're here with insights, stories, and strategies to fuel your midlife journey. So take a breath, lean in. Your revolution starts now.

Coach Wayne:

Hey, welcome again to Midlife Revolution On Leash. And today, we're gonna guide you in how to change the mental script so that you stop playing small, insignificant, and get out of a rut.

Coach Stacy:

Yes, indeed. It is time to renew your mind and challenge some of those unhelpful beliefs about aging. Welcome to the Midlife Revolution Unleashed. I am Stacy M. Lewis, your co-host, a nonprofit executive, a lover of God, and all of his people, and a midlife woman's coach. And it is indeed always my joy, my pleasure, and my honor to be here with my co-host, Coach Wayne.

Coach Wayne:

And right and right alongside Madame Stacy M. Lewis, Coach Extraordinaire, is moi, Coach Wayne Dawson, the VIP coach. I work with men of color, helping them through midlife so that their second half can be their best half. Stacey, today, today we are talking about flipping the script, the mental script, and moving away from those limiting beliefs about aging.

Coach Stacy:

That is indeed what we do. Um, as coaches, as both people, right? We've had to flip our own script. Uh, and as coaches, we are here to provide value tools and equip our listeners along with our clients to indeed challenge those beliefs and begin to rewire the thinking and tell a new story. Let's jump in, Wayne.

Coach Wayne:

Yeah, Stace. The myths are they abound as far as aging, right? Can't teach an old dog new tricks. I'm not a dog, but I can learn tricks any age, anytime, as a one who is going through the changes of midlife. And so can you.

Coach Stacy:

And I think it is it really is the a lot of those old sayings, right? That as you age, you slow down. You can if that's what you choose to do, but it is not a given, it's not a must. It is really, if that's what you decide to do, then great. But if you don't want to slow down, you don't have to.

Coach Wayne:

Think about the tons of folks that you hear that have found their gem, their gold, their best lives after 60 and 70.

Coach Stacy:

Yeah. So, and there's so many. I I think I told you this before, that I was reading an article and it was talking about how Martha Stewart, who's well in her 80s, is starting yet another business, a cosmetic line, right? She is not letting age, and that's just one example, not letting age hold us back. I think we've also seen Oprah reinvent herself in this season, right? That she said, you know, I did the TV show, I enjoyed that, and now it's time to do something different. And so um, it is not too late. I think that's another belief, right, that we have to challenge, that it's too late or I'm too old.

Coach Wayne:

Yeah, Colonel Sanders passed his 70s when he discovered or found that Kentucky recipe that his mother or grandmother had given to him and made big on it. So it goes on and on, Stacy. You just don't stop because you've hit midlife. You begin.

Coach Stacy:

Correct. So what is the what is that one belief for you, our listener? What is that belief? Um, is it the I'm too old? Is it something that Wayne mentioned, something that I mentioned, or is it something else, some other false narrative that has been going through your mind that is not helpful? What is it?

Coach Wayne:

You know, Stacy, I've worked with men who because they're ripe and they're aging, they're afraid to make a mistake because they don't want others to look at them and say they should know better. And that uh is a very limiting belief that holds people back. You you gotta, it's okay, you're not perfect. And and you can make mistakes because it doesn't mean failure. You don't just stop and give up, it's really feedback so that you can avoid the minds as you move forward with that information.

Coach Stacy:

Mm-hmm. Yeah, I there's so many of those beliefs that we have to challenge. And one thing I have reminded uh myself and many of my clients is that you challenge the belief, you will rewrite the narrative, yet it doesn't mean that the belief doesn't come back. So it's it's not it's not a one and done. And so these um stories that we tell ourselves, we not only have to rewrite the story, but we want to make sure that we are calling them out, that we are calling them what they are often. Are they true or are they untruths or lies um about aging?

Coach Wayne:

There's a wonderful affirmation that I think we could share, and that is to start saying, my age is not my disqualification, but it is my qualification.

Coach Stacy:

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. That's good. That's good. Because that can really begin to shift the kind of the foundation of the mindset, right? So that if everything is contingent on the age, that we're really saying it's the age that's not the limitation or the disqualification. It is the age, that saging, as you always say, Wayne, that makes you qualified.

Coach Wayne:

Yeah. It's so important that we also trace the origin of the belief we have, because if the belief for many of us, our beliefs started when we were young, pretty young, by the folks around us. And so we develop these beliefs, and oftentimes they don't serve us anymore. In fact, they never did, but you don't challenge things when you're a kid, and as you grow older, you sometimes are stuck with these ancient beliefs that no longer serve you. So I would say go back and explore where you have some of these limiting beliefs, where did they start, and uh and just reframe them, refresh them as well.

Coach Stacy:

Yes, you're absolutely right. And as I was listening to you, I was thinking about you know the process that I'm often taking women through. And so it is identifying the limiting belief or the lie, um, not only who taught you that, but also how does that show up in your day-to-day life? Often we're carrying these uh unhelpful limiting beliefs, and we're not paying attention to how they actually show up, how we project them, um, how we're experiencing them on a daily basis. So I believe that it's important for us to identify what the belief is, to acknowledge, to your point, where it's come from, and to also really understand or observe how it's showing up in our lives.

Coach Wayne:

And we can test the evidence for ourselves. If we formulate a new belief and we get a different result, especially if the result opposes the limiting belief and its result that we had, then it's proof for the pudding in the pudding, I think, uh, for us to recognize that we can adapt a new belief system, one that is powerful, that empowers us and works for us.

Coach Stacy:

No, that's that's so that's so good, sir. That's so good. Um, and that many of our beliefs, you know, are observed, but they're not earned. They're not, um, so it's it's not only that they're not true, uh, like the I'm too old, right? You didn't earn that. Uh I'm, you know, it's too late. How many of us uh in this season of our lives are continually telling ourselves that it's too late, or I'm too behind, or I should have started years ago. And it is those those uh observations that we are embodying, and we really have to uh come back to your point every time, every time.

Coach Wayne:

Yeah. Stacey, no, I always like to talk about the framework of the work I do, which is to explore why folks aren't where they are, and that gap oftentimes the Paul syndrome pops up where people don't think it's really possible. They don't think they have the ability, they don't think they have the worth or they're worthy. And those are usually limiting beliefs that are not necessarily true at all. Uh, someone else's narrative of who you are, and you conceptualize that and own it, but it's like learn helplessness, learn hopelessness, and learn worthlessness. The truth of the matter is the evidence oftentimes doesn't show and confirm that's who you really are. So you gotta you gotta put aside all that stuff.

Coach Stacy:

Yeah, that's so that's so good. And and one of the reasons that you and I are often uh so in sync is because our core frameworks are um great mirrors, I'll say, of each other, right? Um, for me, it is that that move that magnify your worth. You talked about worth, it is that obtaining clarity around your limiting beliefs, it is validating your value and your dreams and then engaging or experiencing a life that you love. And that the synergy I love between the paw and move uh really is that testing of the evidence, right? Based on knowing your worth and ensuring that you are in a position to continually obtain the clarity that you need in order to engage the life that that you are really wanting to live.

Coach Wayne:

Yeah. And there's a way that we can help you with determining if the belief and the script that you're following and the results that you're observing or receiving is working for you. And we call that an ecological test. What you need to do is just to see how it's impacting, whether positive or negative, the people and things around you, right? Uh, if you're doing something about because you're aging and you think that this is the way to do it, and it's not really having a positive effect on the people around you, whether it's your boss, your employees, uh, neighbors, wife, husband, then you may want to pull back a little bit and re-examine that thing and uh and and apply a new belief system to move forward in a more positive way.

Coach Stacy:

Yeah, I you know, one of the things as you talk about applying a new belief system, um, you know, I I think that this idea, you often use the term saging, and this idea of reminding ourselves that we are aging gracefully, powerfully, and with intentionality is something that we can say or remind ourselves of regardless of the belief. But I and I do think it's important to talk about um rehearsing that new script, right? To really looking at creating the supported beliefs and rehearsing that new script. Let's talk a little bit about that, sir.

Coach Wayne:

Yeah, like anything else, if you want to create a new order of business, you you reinforce it by rehearsal, by practice. You know, if you're they say 10,000 hours of doing the same thing makes you an expert, right? But oftentimes you don't need 10,000 hours, just that much more for yourself than you were doing before to change the outcome. So I think, Stacey, if if you want to rehearse a new outcome uh or have a new outcome, you create a script about the belief system that gives that outcome and you commit to repetition, eventually it hones in uh, you know, you can prune it, get rid of it if it's not part of your neurons, but you can also allow it to grow if you keep adding it to your new affirmation.

Coach Stacy:

I I I love it. And you um and I often talk about, you talk about affirmations, and um, you know, I find for me tying uh my faith, and many of the women I coach um find that that tying in a faith with the the new narrative uh creates really a powerful foundation for rehearsing that new script, for creating a new script and for rehearsing a new script. And so really taking that truth that combats the lie and changing it into or making it a declaration uh that begins to really counter immediately that lie with what you know to be the truth and standing on that in a way that it does become like a rehearsal, right? That you go over it and over it. And whether it means that you put it on your mirror or it's the screensaver on your phone, that you are constantly rehearsing that script. It doesn't necessarily mean you have to be standing in front of the mirror, but it is the mindset, what we're telling ourselves over and over and over, and really reinforcing the positivity um to really drill that in and begin to live that out.

Coach Wayne:

I love that, Stacy. You're talking about creating new habits and uh a very simplistic way that we create habits from a psychological point of view is beliefs impact our values, values impact our thoughts and our talk, our speech, and those impact uh our actions or activities done repeatedly to your point, Stacy. We have habits. So change the belief, change the way we think about it, change the way we act about it on it, and change the way we do things, which is the habits. What happens at the end is you get a new reality or a new outcome.

Coach Stacy:

So important that we continue uh in this process of changing and developing those new habits to observe how those new habits are impacting, to your point, our behavior. How are we living them out? And just like we look at how we were living out the lies or the the unbeliefs, the the or the false beliefs, how are these uh how's the new script, how are we living that out? Um, I think another way, Wayne, is to write things down. We you talked well about habits and developing habits and how they're developed. Oftentimes we commit to something, but it is that act of writing it down that begins to really make it um even more of a bit of a self-accountability. Right now, I wrote it down. I wrote the unhelpful belief and what the new script is. And now, in order to rehearse it, I've written it down. I need to look at it, and I'm then even more so reminded in a way that helps me hold myself accountable to this new belief.

Coach Wayne:

Yeah, and using the art of writing, Stacy, we we advocate for journaling. You can journal, and in so doing, you have a reference, a physical reference of where it is you want to go, what is your new belief is, and and even how to get there. So journal the ideas of manifesting a new belief.

Coach Stacy:

Absolutely. Wayne, one of the joys that you and I both experience as coaches is holding our clients accountable uh with care, uh, with intentionality, yet it is a level of accountability. And so to take it even further in the with the journaling, uh, whether you're using a written journal or your voice notes or the journal app, the reality is that then talking with someone about that helps you really hold yourself to a higher level of accountability. And that's what a coach does. It's not only asking you the right questions and challenging and helping you challenge some of those false narratives, but also then working with you as a power partner to say, now that we've identified the narrative, the false narrative, what is the script? What is the affirmation? What is the declaration that we can begin to put in place? And now that we put that in place, how can we be ensure that you are on a more habitual level embracing this new belief and rehearsing this new script?

Coach Wayne:

Well said, Stacy. And that is the purpose, I think, of the impact that a coach has versus just doing it with a friend. Coach is trained and we see the blind spots. And so oftentimes, Stacy, when I'm working with clients, we get to a place where we do an assessment and they recognize the what, you know, what the gap is. They want to be here, but they're right there, and there's a gap. And so they see the what. The trouble or the challenge is people know the watts, they just don't have the hows. And so when you have an accountability partner, especially say a coach whose job it is and training to help you fill that gap, they can hold you accountable, right? Into the how and following you and tracking you and having you uh, as it were, respond to them, that sense of responsibility, then then then hide behind the rocks and get away because you have nobody to be accountable to when you keep it to yourself.

Coach Stacy:

Yeah, I I couldn't agree with you more. And I would add to that that the coach will also bring that layer of grace. So often we forget that yes, we are going to backslide. That's what they would say, you know, in in the church world. There are times that we uh we we take a few steps forward and we might take a step back. And the in those moments, it is your coach that is going to remind you to show yourself grace, yes, accountability and grace. Accountability and grace. That is the forward momentum because life be life's that's what they say out there in those streets, life be life in. And so we don't want to uh project at all that once you identify the new uh the new story and you begin to embrace it, that you might not take a little step back or a step to the left. The reality is that this is life, yet your coach is going to say, yes, okay, so at least now we're being accountable and let's show ourselves some grace. Let's move through this in a way that allows us to identify what we can change or tweak in a way to really continue to rehearse this new script. So thank you, Stacy.

Coach Wayne:

So I want us to transition, if you don't mind, into some takeaways from today's show. And the first one I want to kick off is take a look at the beliefs that you have in your life and start reframing beliefs in a way that's positive with truth and uh and repetition. So not only list them with the truth, the evidence, but also start repeating them. You can do this through voicing it and playing it over and over or writing it and reading it over and over again.

Coach Stacy:

I love it. I would add that negative beliefs are like a borrowed script, right? It's like me borrowing a story from someone that doesn't necessarily know me and making it my story. Those negative beliefs are borrowed scripts, and Stacey in our community, a lot of the stuff that we believe, the hype is not ours, they're all borrowed.

Coach Wayne:

Right, Stacey, now where I'm going with that.

Coach Stacy:

Yeah, yeah. Yes, I I I totally agree. They are narratives that have been uh contrived, I'll say often, right? That have been woven in a way that we would borrow them and allow them to hold us back. You're absolutely right. Yeah, no more of that.

Coach Wayne:

No, and and we're also strongly urging and suggesting that you balance your beliefs, right? Balance your beliefs, and that will help you to renew your sense of purpose, your why by balancing those beliefs that you have.

Coach Stacy:

Yeah, I would add that reminder of one of my favorite midlife revolution unleashed episodes of all times is that you are still becoming. Your growth does not stop just because you hit 50 or 60 or 70 or even 80. You are still becoming as long as you are here alive and moving forward. There's still things to learn, there's still ways to grow, and I'm sure that there are still negative beliefs, limiting beliefs to combat and rewrite.

Coach Wayne:

Yep, yep. And let's give some assigned uh task, homework, as it were. Number one, we're challenging you over the next few days or this weekend to identify one role model that defies the typical stereotype that may not be real or true. Find a role model that defies the negative stereotype or belief that you have or folks have, and and that becomes your role model, somebody to observe.

Coach Stacy:

Love it. Um I will add take a few minutes to write or to use your voice notes, your journal app, whatever it is that works for you, to write two to three of those beliefs that you're constantly hearing in your mind that you know are not serving you. And as you write them out one by one, begin to rewrite an alternative based in truth that you can then tweak, massage the language to become your power statement, your um alternative, your truth statement, your declaration, your affirmation. So take those two to three beliefs, rewrite them, and then turn them into those affirmations power statements.

Coach Wayne:

Love it. And here's a tip for you for affirmations: write them or record them in the positive. Don't say what you don't want, say it because you get more of it. Say what you do want. And write them in the present tense, in the here and now.

Coach Stacy:

Yeah. I encourage our listener to share one new truth about aging with us. Wayne and I would love to hear from you in the comments, in the subscription section. Uh, share that new truth. Share it with someone in your life that you want to help you be reminded of that truth. Um, and let us know your thoughts. We want to. Know your thoughts about these ideas, this episode, and how you're using this information to shift, to renew your mind and challenge those unhelpful beliefs about aging.

Coach Wayne:

Thanks. And if this episode had a spark for you, please share it with someone else and uh make sure that you subscribe, become a regular viewer if you're watching or a listener, so that you can catch the next episode.

Coach Stacy:

Love, love, love it. My age is not a reason to slow down. It's a reminder that God is still in business and he's not done with me yet.

Coach Wayne:

Stace, how can the good folks find you to get some of that Stacy coaching?

Coach Stacy:

If you are listening to Midlife Revolution Unleashed on your favorite podcast player, please know that our contact information is always in the show notes. And we would always love to hear from you. Uh otherwise online, I can be reached at the THE, StacyMlewis.com. I would love to hear from you. And of course, if you're on the socials, you know how to reach me.

Coach Wayne:

Same for me, Stacy. They can hit me up, and the easiest way to find me is to just go straight to my website, viptransformative living.com. You'll see all my social media handles there. Find one that suits you and DM me. I'll be connecting with ya. And Stacy, don't forget that with folks, when they touch base, I always have a free, powerful self-assessment that can help them kind of determine where they stand in their lives.

Coach Stacy:

Yes, please connect with Wayne for that self-assessment. We will make sure that it is indeed in the show notes. And we appreciate you being our favorite listener of Midlife Revolution Unleashed. I am Coach Stacy. I will see you where I'm cheering you on. Yeah, I will see them at the top while you cheer them on Stacy. Thanks for tuning in to Midlife Revolution Unleashed. We're grateful you're part of this journey.

Coach Wayne:

If you love this episode, share it, subscribe, and hit that notification bell so you don't miss another episode.

Coach Stacy:

I'm Coach Stacy, and I'm cheering you on.

Coach Wayne:

And I'm Coach Wayne, and I'll see you at the top.

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